{Im}perfection

{Im}Perfection

I am a perfectionist. I always have been. I work hard to make sure that I look put together and that everything I do for school and work turns out as best as possible. Even then, sometimes I still don’t think its good enough.

There are positive aspects to being a perfectionist. I work really hard, I’m diligent and deliberate in everything that I do. It’s part of where my drive comes from. But this can also lead to me being harder on myself than necessary.

Because of this, it’s easy for me to question myself. Why did you say that? Why did you miss that easy question? What were you thinking? Did I say enough, too much? Why can’t I get this right? What can I do to make this even better?

As cliche as this sounds, I have to remind myself frequently that I’m not alone in my imperfection and that its 100% okay!

I went through a major transition in life almost two years ago and it created great frustration for me because nothing seemed to be going well and my life was far from perfect. I had the thought that if I was not good enough, then I wouldn’t make friends and my professors wouldn’t like me. I thought that I had to be perfect to gain anyone’s approval in all of my personal and professional relationships.

Copy of for all ages

In the same way, I felt that in order for God to work in my life, I needed to do the right things and say the right things all the time. Also, that if I made any mistakes, big or small, he wouldn’t hear me. If that were true, then I would never see God doing big, amazing things in my life. And He most certainly has!

Something that I’ve been recently reminded of, is that all of those things that I was convinced of are big lies.

  1. ) There is absolutely nothing  I can do to earn God’s favor. He created me the way I am (imperfections and all) very intentionally {Genesis 1:26-27}. He still does incredible things in my life even though I mess up {Jeremiah 29:11}. His Grace and Unconditional Love is accepting of what I see as flaws in myself or mistakes that I have made {Psalm 86:15}. His love is a gift and not something to be earned  {Romans 5:8}.
  2. ) I am more than likely my own biggest critic. The things that I am hard on myself about, might not even be noticed by others. And if they do notice it, they probably don’t care. Most people are understanding of your flaws because everyone’s got them and if their not, then they probably won’t make a very good friend  {Colossians 3:12-14}.

Our brains can often times tell us lies. We can easily get caught up in them and get really down on ourselves. But it is good to be reminded of the Truth. If you are one to be self critical, I hope that my openness can encourage you.

 

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